The Transformative Boundaries Experience is the only program for mothers of adult children with substance abuse disorders that demonstrate how to encourage recovery. Founder Barbara Decker has built a system that helps each parent decide how to do what is best for them. Barbara was inspired to create the program after a heartbreaking time in her life. Now she finds great fulfillment in the work she does every day with parents who are regaining peace in their homes and their hearts, even though addiction has entered their worlds.
Barbara Decker knew something was wrong the second the phone rang at midnight. Alarm bells went off in her head before she even answered. That night, she had been hit with a terrible truth: her son, Eric, was suffering from psychosis due to his drug addiction.
Barbara was in disbelief. How did she miss all the signs? She did everything she could to intervene with Eric’s addiction. Unfortunately, nothing she did helped, and her attempts only made her son resent her more and more.
Desperate for answers, Barbara pleaded with a behavioral therapist for help. What he told her changed her entire approach with her son: “There’s nothing you can do that will help your son. Only he can choose recovery.” After this realization, Barbara started focusing on herself. What she discovered changed hers and Eric’s life. Eric has now been in active recovery for over two years with no relapses. After she started helping herself and changing her responses to the impact of Eric’s addiction, he chose recovery for himself.
Now, Barbara has made it her mission to share all the hard lessons she has learned with other parents to help them find success in encouraging their children to choose recovery with the Transformative Boundaries Experience. She started with a small beta group in May 2019. Now, over thousands have used her methods with phenomenal success. Mothers are improving their lives while also helping their children choose recovery. Their relationships are thriving, and they are learning the best ways to interact with, support, and encourage their adult children to overcome the challenges the disease of addiction brings. Because of her efforts, families are regaining peace in their homes and in their hearts. These heartwarming results have encouraged her to share her program far and wide.
Barbara’s Love Another Way approach provides an action-oriented way of dealing with a family member’s addiction. The program teaches parents how to set Transformative Boundaries, how to avoid enabling the addiction, and many other important strategies. These are easy-to-learn strategies that allow parents to move from one side of the room to the other. Barbara creates a nurturing environment for parents as they learn this system. This community and support of others are required before most parents can move to a healthy place. Barbara’s program covers everything from witnessing the first signs of an addicted child to coping with the struggle of relapses. These programs help parents find ways to support their addicted children without destroying the family.
Barbara Decker knows and understands the pain there is in seeing a child fall into addiction. Through her Love Another Way approach, Barbara hopes more and more families may be saved from this pain.